Post by angelfish on Oct 17, 2014 10:48:52 GMT -5
I thought I should post my story here since I'm new and all, so here it goes.
I really have learned to have my reserves on most gay men. I did the gay pride thing, went to drag shows (partied with drag queens back stage), I've seen Adam for Adam, and done all this and that. Yup i've even found myself barfing up 2 bottles worth of vodka listening to Cher with a queen named Coco I met at a pet store, (it doesn't get much gayer then that, though other things may have been involved which i wont mention). The sex was good but often it ended with someone oweing me money, wrecked car, eviction notices, and arguments... Somewhere at some point all the rainbows and glitter kinda seemed plastic. Just about everyone I knew in this so called community was fake. Like a light bulb went off that said "this is just a 3 ringed circus". Even gay friends of mine I never had sex with, I knew since middle school, really just started showing their second face- particularly when I started questioning them about why do we bother going to these drag shows and what not. It didnt take very long for this realization I was only about 21. For several years, I made it a point to really avoid the gay community and found my life just got so much better and simpler. as the time went on I watched my friends drift into people that was completely unrecognizable, selfish, lazy, every other day was a new situation with them. Around the time of 25 or so I met a man that changed my world. He was gentle, loyal, sweet, a bit of a dope but in a good way. We've been together since. It was around the time of 27 or so I found myself sitting down with the bible- even more I was addicted to every verse. I saw something with everything I never really noticed before. I was excited about things that were so boring like Marriage, and Genealogies, The Laws of Moses and what Jesus's take on them. I became christian.
What worried me so much was the thought of having to leave this wonderful man of mine. Something I also noticed there isn't a lot of credable information out there on being gay. I listened to West borogh baptist church types- just to hear them out. I listened to the theory Eunuchs in Israel were gay and the guy from ethiopia, again just to hear them out. The mistranslations, the liberal guilt fests, the bible isnt real, illuminatti this and that, etc. I even looked through the ancient greek texts to figure out if some of these were true.. I realized I listened to just about all sides of this argument from people instead of gods opinion on it. So I prayed. I told him when I bowed my head to his son that day and told him he can take whatever he wants from me, I really ment it- But as a servant I need a direct order from time to time, I'm not going to find it here on earth or on my own, its too convoluted of a topic down here. I need to know without a shadow of a doubt in my mind from him, that me and my husband are ok with him. I told God to guide me, either take my husband or send a sign, just dont let him get hurt and that he can do whatever he wants to me instead. But Whatever he does I need to know, and im hard headed, so make it loud and clear. It did not take long before my prayer was answered. a few weeks passed, My cat jumped on the laptop I suppose while I was doing laundry. In a pocket of one of my jeans I found a fortune cookie paper, it said "Our prayers are never unheard". I walked upstairs to find my cat seemed to have googled this website. Of all the ways he could have done it!! of all the randomness of the cat and google, the fourtune cookie!! The first line I read was
"There is no word play here, no attempt at looking for loopholes in God's Word, no long-winded historical analysis and flowery liberal rhetoric on the subject. Gay Christian Survivors, an online outreach of King James Bible Ministry and Under the Son Ministries, is a Conservative Fundamentalist Christian minister's intensive and prayerful study on the issue of homosexuality AS THE BIBLE tells it."
"What is this" I thought. "oh gay christian I've heard this before, whats this guys spin on things now" I said to Oliver (the cat). All things considered though that was more or less just the line I wanted to hear. Now I admit I was skeptical I had my reserves when I first was reading through some of this- so I bought the book so I could better read it (I hate the laptop for reading books). I also realized there's things I could nit pick about it, though well written and to the point- on many points. I also realized I was using the fortune cookie paper as a book mark. And so my heart softened as I believe I was being cynical. I've gone around this forum a bit and some other gay christian sites- and found many of us carry a hardened heart.
Well why not? We've been beaten and battered by Bible thumping legalistic pharisees, only to be cared for by politically correct poptarts. Whom dont really know or care about us- other then using us as a tool to show how wonderfully nice they are compared to the alternative, all while they sell out their religion. (ussually theres an agenda involved with them I've found). If that wasnt enough we've beaten ourselves up plenty. All whilst being tossed under a bus by our own so called "Gay Family" members. Some even their blood family members. In a way I kinda related to Jesus even more, He was an outcast who had to deal with very much similar situations. And yet I'm really just addressing gay issues, I could talk more. Truth be told this forum should be 1000 times more active, and this book should be a new york times best seller- considering America and Europe is so "Pro-Gay" and "Christian". At least just for myself I'm glad god lead me to it, Im happy to splatter the internet with it. It's a Cliché but really Rev. James you saved my marriage! I was this close | | to divorce while waiting for a sign, any sign- It couldn't have come in any possible better way.
I really have learned to have my reserves on most gay men. I did the gay pride thing, went to drag shows (partied with drag queens back stage), I've seen Adam for Adam, and done all this and that. Yup i've even found myself barfing up 2 bottles worth of vodka listening to Cher with a queen named Coco I met at a pet store, (it doesn't get much gayer then that, though other things may have been involved which i wont mention). The sex was good but often it ended with someone oweing me money, wrecked car, eviction notices, and arguments... Somewhere at some point all the rainbows and glitter kinda seemed plastic. Just about everyone I knew in this so called community was fake. Like a light bulb went off that said "this is just a 3 ringed circus". Even gay friends of mine I never had sex with, I knew since middle school, really just started showing their second face- particularly when I started questioning them about why do we bother going to these drag shows and what not. It didnt take very long for this realization I was only about 21. For several years, I made it a point to really avoid the gay community and found my life just got so much better and simpler. as the time went on I watched my friends drift into people that was completely unrecognizable, selfish, lazy, every other day was a new situation with them. Around the time of 25 or so I met a man that changed my world. He was gentle, loyal, sweet, a bit of a dope but in a good way. We've been together since. It was around the time of 27 or so I found myself sitting down with the bible- even more I was addicted to every verse. I saw something with everything I never really noticed before. I was excited about things that were so boring like Marriage, and Genealogies, The Laws of Moses and what Jesus's take on them. I became christian.
What worried me so much was the thought of having to leave this wonderful man of mine. Something I also noticed there isn't a lot of credable information out there on being gay. I listened to West borogh baptist church types- just to hear them out. I listened to the theory Eunuchs in Israel were gay and the guy from ethiopia, again just to hear them out. The mistranslations, the liberal guilt fests, the bible isnt real, illuminatti this and that, etc. I even looked through the ancient greek texts to figure out if some of these were true.. I realized I listened to just about all sides of this argument from people instead of gods opinion on it. So I prayed. I told him when I bowed my head to his son that day and told him he can take whatever he wants from me, I really ment it- But as a servant I need a direct order from time to time, I'm not going to find it here on earth or on my own, its too convoluted of a topic down here. I need to know without a shadow of a doubt in my mind from him, that me and my husband are ok with him. I told God to guide me, either take my husband or send a sign, just dont let him get hurt and that he can do whatever he wants to me instead. But Whatever he does I need to know, and im hard headed, so make it loud and clear. It did not take long before my prayer was answered. a few weeks passed, My cat jumped on the laptop I suppose while I was doing laundry. In a pocket of one of my jeans I found a fortune cookie paper, it said "Our prayers are never unheard". I walked upstairs to find my cat seemed to have googled this website. Of all the ways he could have done it!! of all the randomness of the cat and google, the fourtune cookie!! The first line I read was
"There is no word play here, no attempt at looking for loopholes in God's Word, no long-winded historical analysis and flowery liberal rhetoric on the subject. Gay Christian Survivors, an online outreach of King James Bible Ministry and Under the Son Ministries, is a Conservative Fundamentalist Christian minister's intensive and prayerful study on the issue of homosexuality AS THE BIBLE tells it."
"What is this" I thought. "oh gay christian I've heard this before, whats this guys spin on things now" I said to Oliver (the cat). All things considered though that was more or less just the line I wanted to hear. Now I admit I was skeptical I had my reserves when I first was reading through some of this- so I bought the book so I could better read it (I hate the laptop for reading books). I also realized there's things I could nit pick about it, though well written and to the point- on many points. I also realized I was using the fortune cookie paper as a book mark. And so my heart softened as I believe I was being cynical. I've gone around this forum a bit and some other gay christian sites- and found many of us carry a hardened heart.
Well why not? We've been beaten and battered by Bible thumping legalistic pharisees, only to be cared for by politically correct poptarts. Whom dont really know or care about us- other then using us as a tool to show how wonderfully nice they are compared to the alternative, all while they sell out their religion. (ussually theres an agenda involved with them I've found). If that wasnt enough we've beaten ourselves up plenty. All whilst being tossed under a bus by our own so called "Gay Family" members. Some even their blood family members. In a way I kinda related to Jesus even more, He was an outcast who had to deal with very much similar situations. And yet I'm really just addressing gay issues, I could talk more. Truth be told this forum should be 1000 times more active, and this book should be a new york times best seller- considering America and Europe is so "Pro-Gay" and "Christian". At least just for myself I'm glad god lead me to it, Im happy to splatter the internet with it. It's a Cliché but really Rev. James you saved my marriage! I was this close | | to divorce while waiting for a sign, any sign- It couldn't have come in any possible better way.
