I'm a leaf in the wind

[Rev. Jim Cunningham]

From: TheMoodyPoet1 (Original Message) Sent: 1/24/2006 3:40 PM
Hi to everyone in the site. I am new here. I just wanted to say a few words and a few thoughts that I had. A few years ago my friend was a scientologist but he seemed to be falling from one religion to the next. We met when we were both young and on the gay Club Circuit (Discos). As a few years rolled by, we both fast learnt that a BIG part of the gay community was rather primiscious and sex driven. Not that there is anything wrong in sex, but it seemed a lot of our friends were fast being diagnosed with HIV and quite a few committed suicide or had drug overdoses.

In my opinion at the age of 30 now not a lot has changed in the gay community where I live. Since then there are more sauna's, sex haunts, sex driven media and of course the list goes on and on. Having been raised a Christian but not really understanding The Holy Spirit until this year when reading The Bible by choice, I have delved further into my Christian Faith. In a sense I had become saddened with the gay community and even though I did not know then, I was slowly falling into a destructive darkness.

I ran into my old friend about year ago and he invited me to Church. He said he had finally found God and was now a born again Christian and his search was over. I told him upfront that I would not lie about who I was. So I went to Church and told them upfront about who I was and my love of man. They basically said that God loves everyone, even gays. Four of the guys in the cell group said that they too used to be gay and became disillusioned with the gay community. In fact over the time i spent in this cell and with the Church I had come across many former members of the gay community. It reminded me of a Gay Exodus. And I was really shocked at finding people who used to be gay in the Church. In a selfish sense I felt wow.

To me this means quite a few things. Something is definetly going wrong in the gay community of today for so many gay men to be opting out. Although I could not commit to this cell group, or this Church, as I am not willing to say that being in love with a man in the purest of sense is wrong. I still found a purity and a love in this cell group and in this Church that was more forfilling than that was going on in the gay community.

Even though I am refusing to give up on my sexuality, they still want me to come to cell and to Church. Which I think is beautiful. They spoke about how God gave us Free Will to give up temptation. There have been many discussions around the sexuality issue and even the consideration of a buddy-helper to help stop temptation when it arises. However I do stand firm that God made me the way I am, and that I will not live a lie or humour buddy-helper systems. I will not change being gay or being a Christian. My faith in Jesus Christ Our Saviour, and in God and The Holy Spirit is eternal.

What I find sad is still being in the gay community (but at a distance) that our community frowns upon religious gays/lesbians/transexuals and especially gay Christians. My friends think its impossible to be gay and a Christian and if you put in your profile that you are a Christian, you get abusive gay people mocking you and putting you down.

In Him,

Al-Antony Moody

[Rev. Jim Cunningham]

From: Manager Rev. Jim Sent: 2/10/2006 12:40 AM
Hi Al-Anthony Moody,

Welcome to our little group at Gay Christian Survivors. Thank you so much for sharing your experience with us. There are many gay Christians who are going through the very same thing, and by speaking out you help others to not feel so alone.

It is very true that the gay community is so hedonistic. This is so because it is godless, not because it is gay. And it should be pointed out that the heterosexual community is exactly the same way. For example, 75% of all pornography is heterosexual in nature, and 97% of bars, nightclubs and nude reviews in the U.S. alone specifically cater to heterosexuals.

But as Christians we are members of neither the gay or straight communities, but of the community of Faith. I find it very sad that so many gays and lebians who have become fed up with the worldly gay community have begun to think that the only way to leave the gay community is to become straight. But that's a bit like an African man thinking that if he leaves Africa he will no longer be black. Unfortunately, there are far too many anti-gay religious groups who want to make gays feel that the only way out of the gay community is by "changing" to heterosexuality. But all that such groups ever accomplish is forcing the homosexual to hide his identity by convincing him that a change has taken place just for believing in Jesus. It's almost like a game with these groups - "Believe in Jesus today and we'll throw in heterosexuality as a free gift!" They think that homosexuality is a temptation, not an identity. They don't understand that a person can still be homosexual even if they are sexually inactive their entire lives, just as a heterosexual is a heterosexual regardless of whether they have sex or not.

Forunately there are untold numbers of gay Christians who are learning the truth that who you are and what you do are not the same thing. For example, a heterosexual man who has been living a sex-crazed, worldly life doesn't stop being heterosexual when he turns to Jesus and abandons the worldly life. I think that the main reason that so many homosexuals have involved themselves in the seedy world of the gay community is because it seems to be the only place we are welcome. And in fact, that was true for a very long time. But times are a-changing! More and more Christian gays and lesbians are coming out of the church closets all around the world at an amazing rate. I receive letters from even the most remotest countries from gays and lesbians seeking a place of Christian fellowship - Siberia, Loas, Nepal, Ghana, Sri Lanka - and even countries that are known for their hostitily to homosexuals, like Romania, Pakistan, Arabia, Iraq, China, Jamaica, Egypt and Czec Republic. It breaks my heart when I am unable to find any place to direct them to, but I strive to encourage them in the Lord. I remind them that, though they may be alone where they are, they are certainly not alone in the world, because the internet has given us the ability to connect with each other no matter where we are to give each other support. And that of course is the main purpose of our site at Gay Christian Survivors .com. I learn every time I get one of those letters that homosexuals are not what the gay community represents us as, and that we are definitely not what the church says we are.

I am glad to hear that you have found a good Christian cell group to associate with. They can provide you great comfort and assistance in your walk with the Lord. I am also glad to hear that you have stood your ground regarding your sexual identity. If you haven't done so yet, I would encourage you to take the time to review the material I've presented on our site. It will both help strengthen your walk as a gay Christian ( which is an area of support you will not receive from the cell group/church), and it will also provide you with a gentle defense if you are pushed on this issue by fellow believers. And, as always, both I (privately) and the group (publically) are available to you should you ever need encouragement or have issues, doubts or questions - or even a message - that you would like discuss. We were never asked by the Lord to walk His path alone, so let us walk with you, and you with us.

Your brother and servant in Christ Jesus our King,
Rev. Jim

[Rev. Jim Cunningham]

From: TheMoodyPoet1 Sent: 2/12/2006 9:12 AM
Hey Rev. Jim,


I guess I am a leaf blowing in the wind. I have faith in God but at the same time my life is all over the place going in a million directions at once.

I understand that God does not discriminate and we as a community should open our arms to all. However I find it so hard as a gay man finding Christ from a gay man's prospective. I get all this its an obimination stuff from my friends cell group and there is nothing I can do to make them see differently.

There should be a Tutorial's on how to start off as a gay man finding Christianity. I am reading this site which is helpful. Thank-you.

I dunno. Im kinda confused at the moment. My family are Catholic and are begging me to become a Catholic, but so far I prefer Christianity as when Jesus walked the earth he did not like the corruption of the Church in his time as they seemed profit driven. I remember a story in the bible where Jesus trashed the courtyard where merchants had been allowed to do business by the Rabbi's. I guess it was unholy to desecrate the Church like that. I also noticed Jesus wandered the land in his ministry.

I dont want to belong to a faith that is ruled by a major heirarchy, money or anything else. I guess we are born with sin so why should The Pope be above everyone else? Does anyone know the differences between Christianity and Catholicism? Why would i join one over the other?

I guess I have typed too much

cheers

alan

[Rev. Jim Cunningham]

From: Manager Rev. Jim Sent: 2/13/2006 9:30 AM
Hi Al-Antony,

Glad to hear from you again. I received the other email you sent to me, and I'll be replying to it soon. I will also discuss the issue of Catholicism with you at that time.

As for the cell group, my humble advice to you is to avoid the issue of homosexuality with them. If they bring it up, simply say that you would rather not discuss that topic at the moment. Be kind, but firm. If you choose to stay with them, give them time to get to know you better, and give yourself time to arm yourself better so that you can confront them on this issue when the time is right. Let the Lord determine that time. He will tell you what to say, and when to say it. For the time being, simply enjoy your Christian fellowship with them.

In the mean time, strengthening your relationship with the Lord is the best thing for you right now. There are several things you can do. Bible study, of course, and prayer - simple and honest prayer, not a "now I lay me down to sleep" scripted prayer. Chat with the Lord. Spend time THANKING the Lord for anything and everything that He has done for you and that He WILL do for you. Sing songs and hymns to Him. If you don't know any worship songs, go to a Christain bookstore and buy some worship music CDs and learn some songs. Delight yourself in His presence. Meditate on His acts of wonder and give Him praises for them. And most importantly, "be care-ful for nothing". That is, do not worry or be concerned about anything - not your sexuality, not your life, nothing. Worry is based on fear, and fear is the opposite of faith, which leads to the dark side (forgive me, Yoda).

It is written, "That which is not of faith is sin," and, "without faith it is impossible to please God; he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a REWARDER of them that diligently seek Him." Relax and be content in the knowledge that the Lord "will never leave thee nor foresake thee." God already knows we aren't perfect, and that's why "while ye were yet sinners, Christ died for us." Be at peace. Trust the Father.

Love in Christ Jesus,
Rev. Jim

[Rev. Jim Cunningham]

From: TheMoodyPoet1 Sent: 2/13/2006 11:08 AM
Will do Rev. Jim

thank-you

al-antony

[Rev. Jim Cunningham]

From: Skylark4383 Sent: 2/13/2006 1:24 PM


Dear Rev. Jim, I know your message wasn't intended for me, but it was good to hear the message, again. I am a Catholic, who has been left by the church because of my sexual preferences. I miss Mass terribly. Please keep up your ministry to those of us who need to be fed the word of God and reassured that we aren't "junk". May Almighty God bless and keep you in the Palm of His Hand.